Losing a loved one whether it is a family member, or a close friend is difficult to process and understanding what happens at the time of death of someone close to you is important, so one doesn't feel alone or depressed. There are five stages of grief that many are familiar with but don't recognize when going through the stages after losing an important person in their life. Identifying each stage of grief, understanding what each stage means, and how to cope with each stage is important to be able to continue living through life. When a close loved one dies, it can be difficult to figure out how to continue to live and knowing the five stages of grief plus getting additional help as needed (such as therapy or counseling) will help you to move forward.
The five stages of grief are denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Each of these stages happen at some point but not necessarily in this order and not immediately after a loss of a loved one. Everyone copes differently with loss; some individuals start with anger then denial and so on while others start with depression. The stages don't happen in a few weeks after the loss or even months. The stages continue on throughout a person lifetime until it is their time to die. As time moves forward from the death, the stages get easier in a sense with length of time in each stage but necessary the impact. For example, the depression stage can happen again five years after the death but the length of time in depression may be a day were at the time of death lasted for a month. The feeling of depression will feel the same meaning the pain doesn't lessen but the length of time does.
Each stage of grief has it place and understanding what each stage is will help someone going through a loss throughout their lifetime to move forward with living. The first stage denial is when someone refuses the reality of losing a loved one. A person can show signs of this by refusing the acknowledge of death, refusing to discuss the death, or stating the death isn't true. The second stage anger is when the person accepts the death but starts taking out their anger against other loved ones or medical professionals. A person can show signs of anger after loss by blaming doctors or family members, feeling anger towards a higher spiritual being (such as God), feeling anger against oneself, and short tempered or patience. The third stage bargaining is when a person tries to negotiate an agreement with oneself or a higher spiritual being to try processing the feeling of being sad. A person can show this by stating comments such as "I should have brought her to the doctor sooner" or "God, if you bring them back, I promise to be a better person". The fourth stage depression is when a person is feeling sadness or hopelessness. A person shows signs of this by feeling sadness, changes in sleep, loss of interest in activities, lack of energy, decreased concentration, feeling worthless and agitated, and significant changes in weight. The last stage acceptance is when a person finally accepts the loss of the loved one and moves forward by celebrating their life.
These stages are normal with a loss of a loved one but if a stage lasts over a year or it starts affecting negatively on your life then contact your doctor. For example, if you have trouble carrying out normal routines, spending more time alone than usual, believing you did something wrong, and especially reach out if you feel like not living without your loved one or that life doesn't feel like worth living anymore. To prevent these feelings negatively impacting your life, seek out help and support from close ones and bereavement counseling. Not discussing the traumatic event of losing a loved one can led to thoughts of extreme depression and suicide so it is very important to keep talking or being around others even when it seems difficult.
Sources
https://www.health.harvard.edu/mind-and-mood/5-stages-of-grief-coping-with-the-loss-of-a-loved-one Assessed and Endorsed by the MedReport Medical Review Board
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